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If you haven't noticed by now, I am a Mooney. I love my last name, I really do. I even considered keeping it whenever I got married, that is how much I really love being a Mooney. Obviously being a Mooney is exciting, but with that joy comes bad luck. You know how they always say "the luck of the Irish"? Yeah, don't let them fool you. They never specified what kind of luck the Irish really have.

Today has just been one of those days. I feel like no matter what I do, nothing is going to work out the way I would like for it to go. But, that's just my luck.I recently found out that I (the 18 year old, who has never held a real job) have to pay for my own college. Not only do I have to pay for my schooling, but I have to buy myself a car. I know, I know...I'm not the only one that's had to do it, but still. It's driving me insane just thinking about it. It's been bothering me all day long. A few days ago I made the biggest purchase of my entire life...I finally broke down and bought myself an iPhone. Normally I try to save my money, but my trackball on my Blackberry scrolled through its last text message a long time ago. I had to do it. Really, I did. Now, I have about $20 left. Granted, a lot of people do owe me money...no one owes me $20,000.

*Losing this car has made things so much harder*

As of right now, I do not have any clue as to how I am going to go about this. I've applied for scholarships, I have looked up Grants, I have applied for countless jobs. Nothing, I do mean nothing is seeming to work. I am pretty-sure I have been more stressed in the last four days than I have been this last year. I've dealt with a lot in the last 18 years. I have always gotten through things rather easily, but this, this I have no idea how to handle. It irks me to no end. The only thing I can do from here on is hope & pray for the best. Stay positive. I've done what I can do, I've asked for help, I really don't think there's anymore that I could possibly do.

(Our very first picture together, exactly 3 years ago)
*But, having him in my life has made it so much better*

Now that we have established the depressing part of my day, I'd like to mention one thing that is keeping me from being in a totally crappy mood - Christopher Michael Smith. As of yesterday, Chris and I have known each other for exactly three years. Oftentimes I think of myself as a middle aged woman, somewhere around thirty-six or so. (Like I said, I've been through a lot in the last few years.) So to me it feels like we've been together for twenty years, but three years makes me just as happy. Most high school relationships only last a year at the most, so to know that we have more than doubled that standard just brightens my day. Luckily, Chris has been by my side through it all. Most guys would have left, and the few that may have stayed could have NEVER been as amazing as Chris has. If I actually sat here and listed everything that he has done for me and my brother & sister over the last three years, this blog would easily turn into a novel. I know that I do not thank him half as much as I should, or tell him just how much he truly means to me. So Chris, if you ever read this just know how special you are to me. I could have never done it without you, honestly.

I'm going to try to blog as often as I can. I've been wanting to buy a diary for quite some time now. But that would mean I would have to write...a lot. I know that if I actually went out and bought the dairy, I might write once every other week. But, with blogging I am hoping to keep everyone as updated as possible. I am super excited about this, and I really hope I can keep up with it! I promise a majority of my posts will not be as depressing as this one. Thanks for reading!


XoXo, SM.